Passion Play

A sweat bid trickles down,
The scent rises.
I start to drown,
Numbing my senses ...

Where, we lay bare ,
The earth starts to tremor.
Bodies go taut
And slumps into a lot
of spent forces of vital energy.
Still physically joined in body ...

But minds drift afar
At the midnight hour
Gathering strength for
Another Tepid repetition

Eyes

Two pairs of eyes meet
Everyday they smile
two hearts, as one they beat
To walk the unending mile
With smile and a tear and elixir...

His pair of eyes, are blind
beyond her eyes, he cannot find
The world around and she
Gazes the world but cannot see
His eyes with smile and a drop of tear

The Umpteenth Amendment ..

My Mind is dazed 
But I'm ready to mend 
My days are razed 
I comprehend 
That forward is the 
Only way to go ... 

My vision blurred 
I think again 
With every word 
Of nights insane 
I still can make your shadow 
In the dark... 

I hope for you.. 
'Cause hope is all 
That I can do 
To break this fall 
I'm here waiting 
For the night to glow..

I cry a bit 
And hide my tears 
I die a bit 
Along my fears 
I thought I would 
Never ever need to say.... 

I'm still waiting 
For the night to glow.. 
I'm still waiting 
For you to show.. 
The only way 
We knew we could walk ...

......
......
......

I comprehend...
I mend...
And I mend ...

My conscience wasn't missing .. 
After all ....

Dual Identity ( apologies in advance )

The Two faced guy
Dual identity
One Sweet n shy
Other , dark insanity 


I've been like that for all my virtual life ... maintaining two faces .. or rather two separate masks hide me according to the needs of the situation .. Does that make me a lier ?? No, I don't believe so .. As everybody knows ..that THIS is the SAME " SAURABH " as the other identity .. they're two sides of the same coin ... and I don't PRETEND to be someone else .. I just chose to present different aspects of my persona via different "profiles"!!

Anyways, .. this is not about MY dual identity , no !
This is about people who make use of this dual identity for other reasons .. 


You maintain two faces
One , that disgraces
Other, looks frail
And victimized 

You, defame people with your sharp tongue , harsh words . Though, I don't think you really have the right . You , yourself remains hidden .. taking refuge of your other identity . THIS identity, I should add , invariably projects you as a "frail" , helpless , Victimized person ... Victimized by every single person around you .. 

Everybody wants to know how people thinks about him/her .. Even I would want to find out what people REALLY think about me !! But then , you chose a WRONG path to know this , my friend !! Be a bit "Clairsentient" ... TRY !! Otherwise ..DON'T try to find out what people REALLY think about you ...

Frankly, you don't have it in you to handle the information ... You try to take a quick look .. and when you see something not very good said against ANY one .. you presume that it's about you .. you do not even bother to check .. Hmm... Do i smell guilt ?? Only if YOU YOURSELF know that those negative things are something that suits YOU better .. only THEN you'd behave this way !! SO, my friend !! You ARE a prisoner of guilt !


Venting your guilt
That was built 
Over the debris 
Eats you now
Like a disease

Curiosity kills
The bitter pills
Of Truth
Which were not for you ..
But you're so eager
To have them too!!

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DISCLAIMER : This is not personal .. this is just a random write .. if anybody thinks otherwise ..then even if this is not intentionally personal ... STILL I apologise to those ppl who THINKS its for them .....

Dark Gulal

Dark gloomy faces
And Torn dresses
Cannot even afford
A tinge of gulal

My White holi dress
My dark ashamed face
Couldn't even make'em smile
Those eyes behind curls 

One dark small room
Creating the gloom
Darkening those faces
Dark gulal ??

I wont play, 
today.
My sprinkler...
I don't need.
You can keep,
The water balloons 

Think for a minute ...
This is how I mean it 
We, coloured bright,
Forgot to look
Underneath the light
It's soot black there
And we don't even care
For this monochromatic world
Of black despair ...

Dark gulal , they get... for free
Everyday's toil to live
Aborting the dreams
Everyday they conceive

Dark gulal, from their own
Charred, burnt bones
Mixed with water
From the corporation taps
Which perhaps ...
No thicker than their own
Last few drops of blood that remain
Loyal to their body ...

A Nightmare !!!

Enter ...

Darkness screams..

The centre 

And the outer rims 

Collide ...

*****

*****

You wake up ...

sweating ....

NIGHTMARE !!!

A Moment ...

An intimate moment  

As fragile as the smell 

Of your perfume ... 

Forever spent .. 

And you consume 

My mind , my body 

My soul ...

Winter Asks ... Spring Answers ...

Winter , all white
Lived like a nun
In the " church of light"
Forever cleansing
Erasing joy
Restraining ...


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Spring , all bright
Lived as the "sun"
In the " church of delight "
Forever singing
Enhancing joy
Rejoicing ....


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And winter asks ......


" Why do birds fly
In the sky ?

Why man dies ...
And lie on earth ?

Why can't I laugh
Like a kid , sterile ?

Why's there no time
To sit and smile ? "



And the spring answers ....


" Birds fly in the sky
As the next best thing
Since ,.. you fly
Through the songs
I sing
For you ...

And man dies
And lie on earth
To stay closer
To his worth
But , I
In love , I die
For you ...

We can't laugh
Like a small kid
That's why we'll bring one
To this earth ,
From our seed
Through you ...

There's no time
To sit and smile
Must come closer
To form a rhyme
Then I can sing my love
For you ... "



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Winter gushes ..
With white blushes
And asks ......


"Why these fears, I carry ?

Why didn't you come
Earlier in my life ?

Why time moves
So swiftly with you ?

Why do you take
Away all my strife ? "


Spring adored
Winter with "red"
And said ....


" White snowy fear
You so far carried ,
So that I could smear
Them with blossoms i bled
And paint them with flare
For you ....

I didn't come earlier
As time never saw
So much of love
And it was in awe
Frozen ,
By you .....

And Now my dear
Time's jealous of us
Alone are its tears
That why it tries
To swiftly pass
For time's a loner
Deprived forever,
Of you ...

Your strife , my blessings
As I simply can sing
The story of my love
Which I'm ever musing
And my muse again
It's you ... "

The Stifled Cry Song .. ( The Forgotten Raga )

Choking voices ...
Eyes that cried 
Wrong choices ??
No , they were right

Against your "push", I "pull"
I'm a fighting fool
My greed for pain , too strong
And I'll have yours, before long

The Notes feel so wrong
The lyrics are astray
The stifled cry song ..
I Carry to sing this way

The sobs as pauses 
To truncate the beat
The tears flow, discrete
Crescendo ...

Orchestrating rain
To elongate the pain
An unending saga
The forgotten raga..

Perfect Day , You Say ??

My Perfect Day was Snatched away
Never believed it can happen this way
But all my worth is gone
All my smiles forlorn


I die thousand deaths in one
My perfect day just died
And everything I tried ..
But all my efforts came to none

My perfect day never stayed
In my fate it was said ..
That my nascent joyus dawn
Will be rudely raped and torn

My perfect day was gone 
Even before it came 
Like a bad omen it lurks
Around the constant sorrow 
That I carry along my name ....


Aahh .. FINALLY !!
My perfect day was gone !!

The Answer To Nothing ( Part - I )

Turbulent times ...

Flashing dreams

Flotsam and jetsam

Of Broken rhymes

Meaningless days and their meaningless trends . Mindless people following them . At times , it feels like , having a mind is a curse ! Mind dreams . Well , yes , dreams ARE reality waiting to happen. But before it happens , it is but a luxury for people like me .

Not always true , the things we say

Mostly false are the things we write

But When a poet craves for pain

From the world , he cannot hide ...

But why ? Why is it so ?? I feel so utterly exposed ! The world around asks all sorts of questions , like why do I crave for pain ? ...

I , myself , dont know the answer to it . But , this is what goes on inside my head . I guess , that's a good enough answer for you guys ! And for me ?? .. It sucks ! 

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Love , time , money , goal , responsibilities . These factors form the five tupple set for the automata of life. But more often than not, at least one of them goes missing.

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...

Love , like your life's at stake

Time will test your need

Money , does matter , and you need to make

Goal , is where your dreams will lead

Responsibilities, the necessary shackles ...